I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
