dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
