there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
