her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
