we have officially lost it.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
