I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize