did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
