I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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