quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
