Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
