Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Do vagina's smell?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Randomize