so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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