I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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