I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
