he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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