You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
