I love black thongs
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize