they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
We were destined to go to rehab together
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
