He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize