I'm lost and stupid without you.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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