gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
