i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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