How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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