So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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