D3 body, D1 cock
I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
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