Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Farmville is her only friend.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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