A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
