i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
