i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
