dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
