Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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