And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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