Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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