note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
