THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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