Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
