What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Can Purell be used as lube?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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