I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
