So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
