As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
