I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
His hands were made for my vagina.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
