Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
