just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
