Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
