Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize