i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
