I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
