My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
you inspire me to be a worse person
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
