I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Shame - the story of my life.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
