I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Randomize
