you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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