MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i want to swaddle you in tequila
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize