filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
